Why love Poetry? #FamilyLife

Stuart Farrar. To quote Toni Morrison, "If there's a book you really want to read but it hasn't been written yet, then you must write it", so that's what we did!

If you look on Amazon these days for love poems, we're sorry to say that most of what you will spot is anthologies of poetry by other people, and piles of these include what are often referred to as "the classics", which is frequently another way of saying that they're very old.

What you may have trouble finding are collections of fresh, modern, original love poetry.

And this, to us, is sad, as the issues raised in love poems from centuries ago are doubtless not those relevant to couples nowadays.

What do we mean by that?

While it's correct that romance and love are eternal, in a large number of households today, both the husband and the wife have no choice but to go out to work, just to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table, never mind enjoy a few indulgences.

Modern life is frenetic, resulting in people not having sufficient time to truly develop their relationships and keep them healthy - in many instances, husbands and wives barely even see each other at all other than on Saturdays and Sundays.

And the numbers of divorces created from this marital entropy are truly shocking.

Nonetheless, it's our opinion that love poems can help in all sorts of ways.

Let's start when the fire of love is first ignited, for example.

In our case, we met online because we lived on different continents. And while we spent up to 12 hours a day chatting via Internet telephony (e.g. Skype), email and IM, we wanted something to help enhance the bond that was fast developing.

So, every single day, attached to a long e-card that described what we'd been up to and how we felt, a love poem was included.

Now, these love poems were not copied from some other poetry collection, but were hand-crafted, but don't worry if you don't feel up to writing your own poetry - as long as the poem conveys the right sentiments, it will still achieve your objectives.

You see, the key consideration is that the poem must be heart-felt and sincere, and not something you borrowed from inside a soppy greetings card.

You might feel that, as a man, love poetry is a bit too effeminate, but you'd be 100% incorrect!

Actually, the vast majority of ladies will really appreciate the fact that you are able put your emotions into words, something that males are renowned for finding difficult.

Now, you might be put off because women nowadays are often a lot more assertive, or even belligerent, than in days gone by, but you shouldn't be. If you think about it, they have little choice if they want to flourish and have their voices heard in what is still very much a male-dominated world.

Even if this is the case, it doesn't mean that they don't cherish romance, courteous gestures, and a display of natural emotion.

So, although you may feel that you're not be the next Byron or Wordsworth, it doesn't matter - trust us!

These days, we've been married for over five years, but a romantic poem every day is still a major part of our relationship.

We are lucky because we run our business from home, together, and so are with each other 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Now, this may be a shocking prospect for a lot of couples, but not for us, because we spend time making sure that our relationship works and is strong (and that we're very compatible in the areas that definitely matter).

But for those couples who spend most of the day apart, then dash home to do the chores, make a meal, look after the children and so on., then it can be difficult to find the time to do those little things that make a difference - like telling each other you that you love them, and also that you appreciate them for what they do and for who they are.

A love poem can say all of these things, and if reading the poetry out loud is not something you'd feel comfortable doing (although you really should give this a try), then a great alternative is to write some poetry and leave it somewhere for your lover to discover, such as on her pillow, or pop it into her handbag or purse so she'll find it when she arrives at her office?

Here's an ever better idea -, why not post her some love poetry to where she works - all of her colleagues will turn green with envy, we promise you, and earn you a ton of brownie points as well, but that's just an extra bonus.

However you do it, it's important that you should find ways to let your partner know how much they mean to you as often as you can.

Romantic poetry is also a way to paint a vision of the life you promise yourselves you'll have in the future - trips out, foreign holidays, the model family, growing old together, as well as being one way to deal with daily matters that might not be part of your lifelong dream, but which you can't avoid.

For example, you could write a poem about how much you dislike having to be separated when one or both of you go to work - it's necessary, but telling your spouse that you miss her will lift both of your spirits.

On to more fun things - what about your fantasies?

Many folks have what you might call "bedroom fantasies", which they may not want to talk about or ask for, but if you raise the suggestion via love poetry, it opens the door for a pleasure you might otherwise not have the chance to enjoy.

And after you've had that unforgettable night, why not write more poetry as a "thank you", or to touch upon what you did (and these can be as personal and raunchy as you want, as they're for your and her eyes only)?

All this talk of writing poems may intimidate you, but it needn't - if you have the words in your heart, translating them into verse is the simple part.

Our preference is for traditional poetry (i.e. Lines that rhyme with a consistent meter), but if would rather try something different, that's fine too - the only thing that matters is to get your message across.

You could stick to the very formal sonnet, or you could write a poem of many, many verses, or you could even opt for the minimalist oriental haiku.

It really doesn't matter, because what you will find is that the mere act of writing some poetry for your partner will instantly put you in a fantastic state of mind, and likewise, it will have the same effect on that special lady when she reads what you have created, just for her.

We urge you to have a go - you won't be disappointed - and nor will your wife!